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Sex For Stress & Being Unexpectedly Productive

This morning started as yesterday ended, with sex, and no-one was more surprised about that than me. Bear’s been pretty distant the past few weeks and I totally understand that he’s been busy and has a lot on his mind, so is tired and not really in the mood for anything more affectionate than a peck on the lips and a cuddle, so last night’s enthusiasm for more than a cuddle was a nice surprise and this morning’s continuation was an even bigger one.

I find sex to be a great stress reliever and with that relief comes a calmer, more peaceful and focused approach to whatever my current stress is. There is a high chance we won’t be able to make it to the wedding on Saturday. There have been a number of Corona Virus cases in our town and in a neighbouring town, and closing the Dutch borders to travellers is under serious consideration. It means I won’t get to see my son, or meet his fiancee and that we’ll have lost the small fortune we spent on clothes, shoes, my tattoo and the hotel. Thankfully, the ferry company lets you transfer your journey to another time.

I would have gotten my hair done anyway, the wedding just seemed like a good excuse to get it done, otherwise I would have done it closer to my birthday in a few months. The tattoo probably wouldn’t have been done. There seems little point in stressing about it, so I’m not anymore. If we can’t go, we can’t go. We’ll just have to save the outfits for another occasion if and when one presents itself and wish my sister all the luck in the world that her wedding goes as well as she hopes.

Earlier today I decided to clean my front window and started a ripple effect of productivity I didn’t mean to set in motion, but now that jobs have actually gotten done and with none of the usual tutting and sighing, I’m pretty pleased it happened that way. I pulled the furniture out into the middle of the room, to get to the window, and discovered a swath of black mould along the wall under the window… there’s a hole in the front wall outside next to the front steps that Bear has been saying he’ll deal with since… forever.

I showed him the black mould and how bad it was on the inside wall, so he went outside and filled the hole with expanding foam and filler to seal it, while I scrubbed the walls and cleaned up as much of the mould as I could. Then he came in and helped do the worst of it, because my shoulders weren’t happy about all the pressure from scrubbing. Then he went shopping for me and got some mould-killing spray and sprayed it on when he got back. I cleaned the window.

Then he took me to Ikea to get some new blinds, as the ones we have now are seven years old and made from a very fragile non-cleanable material. They’re going yellow from all the cooking that’s been done and all of our fingerprints from moving them about so much over the years, and I hate that they can’t be washed. So we replaced them. After Ikea we went to the garden centre to get some composting soil for the garden.

Our soil is terrible, it doesn’t hold moisture, so doesn’t hold nutrients and is mostly sand and silt, very little actually grows in it, so we try to give it a boost every Spring and Summer with 160-200 litres of composted soil. We were also looking for a really big round patio planter, but they only had the smaller versions left, so we didn’t bother, passing through the flower section on our way out where I saw a gorgeous purple and mango coloured honeysuckle plant.

Bear saw a Ceanothus that climbs and decided to give that a try. We’ve had 3 previous stand alone ceanothus plants that are supposed to bush out on a long stalk…. every one of them has died… the last one ‘Connie’ lasted a couple of years, but eventually gave up and died on us a couple years ago. So now Bear’s decided to try again with a climbing version. He sure has staying power, I’ll give him that. I’ve given up on Ceanothus’, I’ll stick with Buddleias for my ‘pretty’ fix. I’ve never had issues with buddleias.

We came home, and Bear went straight out into the garden to re-home the honeysuckle and Ceanothus and made a teepee around the blackberry brambles with the longer garden poles and got them off the ground and circled around the teepee, so the damn slugs can’t get to them this summer. I pruned the raspberry bush, while he re-potted my Bromelia and the avocado plant he’s grown from an avocado stone and tamed my crazy buddleia, which is again intent on garden domination.


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